Observation

Humankind...is tumbling down hill at a rather rapid rate. We are not progressing; we are fighting wars that began centuries ago over power and natural resources, we are debating topics that are no longer even worth talking about, we are wasteful, and most of all we are dumbing ourselves down. Humans are not even kind to each other anymore; greed and selfishness has become all too familiar.

ARTEMIVSK, Ukraine — Although government forces say they’re steadily closing in on pro-Russia separatists based in the eastern cities of Donetsk and Luhansk, the situation on the ground here remains fluid, with rebels staging counterattacks. Russian News

 The attacks come one day after President Obama authorized air strikes in Iraq if necessary. Iraq News

 Two Israelis were lightly wounded from a mortar shell In Shaar Hanegev Regional Council, and the IDF Home Front Command ordered the opening of all shelters within an 80 kilometer radius from the Strip. Israel News

 These are a few of the headlines I found today with simple searches. How are we supposed to transform into a Global Type I society if we can't even get along?

Presidential elections are coming up and guess what the topics up for debate are going to be? I'm sure you already know, they are the same topics that have been debated since your birth-abortion rights, budget, healthcare, social security, etc. When are we going to get progressive and start outlining public policy, legislation, and protections for things like Alternative fuel sources, Environmental protections,Sustainability, GMO's, Transhumanism, Cloning, Technology? These things are here people---right in your face, do you know where any politician stands on these issues? I am going to guess that they are going to take the side of the corporations that are producing and controlling these technologies.

Humankind has become so wasteful, I fear that we have forgotten that we are supposed to co-exsist with nature instead of robbing, stealing, and sucking it dry. Big Oil needs to end, there are more beneficial ways to produce the energy that we need. Look at what is happening to the world-how can you deny it?

Idiocracy: A movie that was originally a comedy, but became a documentary.

I am not even going to lie, this movie was hilarious! It does seem to represent the future of 'Merica!
Our education system is one of the worst in the industrialized nations of the world. Due to unemployment (which I do not see getting better) people are becoming lazier and adopting more of an entitlement attitude. Everything is competitive...competition based on the theory of natural selection is healthy, but when people are beating each other up every black friday for the 1 new video gaming system Walmart has in stock...absurd.

The thing that saddens me the most is that the people of this world are so bitter and angry, the actual essence of humanity is gone. Every human being wants to be accepted and loved. The someone is just different for everyone. It's emotion, something that sets apart from the other species on the planet. Some may think this emotion makes us above the rest or the species, I know first hand, how it can be a curse. Instead of telling you my life story, I am going to take a popular story and dissect it.
The recent blockbuster hit the Great Gatsby, which is based on a book written in 1925 by Scott Fitzgerald.

Gatsby has amassed a vast fortune in order to win the affections of the upper-class Daisy Buchanan, but his mysterious past stands in the way of his being accepted by her.

Character Analysis 

What saddens me the most is that Gatsby essentially died for Daisy and after all was said and done, all of the people that knew Gatsby and attended his parties...never even showed up at his funeral, neither did she.That says a lot...it says too much.
It is a reality of today, people are so caught up in themselves they just walk away. How have we learned to so easily turn off our emotions?

I don't want to be a part of this society, this callousness of an existence.  So I am figuring out ways to set an example and revolutionize the notion of change.

The day I found Jesus...

This one Friday night....

I went to the rock show....

to photograph a great band...

and I met a boy...

who has a thing for big hair...

he is a baller...

he screams at Spiders...

He loves the stars....

he makes me laugh so hard...

he has a stellar heart...

and can sing from his throat like a monster...

this boy from the rock show...

that they call  Jesus!

Lexi's woodland adventure

The day was gorgeous, chilly and clear...I found so many beautiful creatures, plants, lines, and flaws... I just had to share it with someone!

Click the link  -> Enjoy

Thesis for Mat

My relationship with my so-called best friend is rather confusing to many and in fact, has ended become the basic seed of jealousy in other relationships. I am always honest and up front with new people that come into my life. I tell them that Cricket is my best friend, he will always come first, and if I am put in a position to choose one or the other, I will choose Cricket. However, they think they can handle it-but in the end, they can not, thus the relationship dissolves. This might be a defense mechanism though because the right guy for me will know how to handle this situation to where I do not have to chose. Right now, Cricket is not being very useful to me, and is more of a burden, but my values tell me not to abort mission.
Cricket lives with me, I pay the bills, I take care of him financially. I have taught him the ways of being on the more responsible right hand path. He has a job making cell phone app's that is part time. He can not afford much and his pay is never steady. He can not get a real-life job for numerous reasons-the main one being his criminal record. This is not an easy task for me, although I make good money, I am not rich. We live in a two bedroom apartment and share a room because we have a third roommate who occupies the other room. He sleeps during the day and I sleep at night. I will not throw him out on the street or let him starve. However, I do not keep him here. If he wants to leave he can at any time. I complain a lot about him sometimes because I wish I didn't have all the weight of the world on my shoulders. So "why?" is probably what keeps going through your head.

It's simple. He saved my life. When I gave up and pushed everyone and everything away from me, he was the only person to walk in and treat me like a solider. He wasn't nice and lovey, he made me think and analyze the situations that kept me in a horrid depression. He was mean, he honestly and accurately pointed out my flaws every day. He never left even when I disappointed him, even when I tried to push him away, or walk away. He knows how I work and my darkest fears. For that, I love him, without any expectations.  Only one other person in my life, ever tried to really know me beyond the persona that I put out. That person, I told you about before, is the love of my life. I used to have Cricket on this huge pedestal  but he is no longer, we are equals, with our own strengths and weaknesses. When we work together, things happen, we impact the world. This is what I mean when I say the binary star.

Cricket and I are also business partners. We have a company called Wicked City Multimedia. The main goal is to bring art to the science community through different media facets. It started off the we were going to create the world of "wicked city" ( a metaphor for a postmodern world that is in Cricket's head) by making it a game. An rpg as we made the protocol then as we tested things out it was going on a virtual platform. The ideas in this game are very explicit. The world is vile, it is full of villains and vixens, a lot of left hand path ideas are considered the norms. It is a world in which humans and post humans exists  A lot of postmodern elements rule the culture and lifestyle. There is a story line that the gamers can follow. The story line is based off parallel events and people in his life. So when we were in this stage of thinking, it was imperative for the stakeholders of the company to address a character archetype when in the public eye. I naturally, decided to be a vixen. Cricket took on the role of being a villain and he mastered the idea of social game. Social game theory is an element to the role play, it is basically strategies to manipulate social situations to your advantage.  At this point in time, I began to visualize myself as this vixen type, and quite frankly it terrified me. I like being nice and sweet and naive. I am not a sexual harlot so to speak and actually before I met Cricket I hated having sex. Don't confuse that. I have NEVER as much as held Cricket's hand, let alone had sex with him. He just made me open up about my feelings on it and helped me reflect on things that have happened to me to make me such a prude. So we made a lot of progress with the company, but Cricket's brain works to fast for things to be materialized. I learned to love Wicked City. I got to put in my own story lines and ideas in places, I got to do some art inspired projects, and photography. So, as I am working on getting things done for the RPG, he switches modes on me.

This is where the lab experiment and the D/s game comes into play. He decided that because he is dominant in most social situations that he wanted to experiment with being submissive. There is a whole other element to this from his perspective (but it is his story to share), so anyways, I am submissive to him and therefore, I was not the correct person for the job. He turned to IMVU, however, to keep me in the loop he challenged me to try to be dominant in the relationships that I have. I do not really get off with virtual worlds, so I play this game in real life with people who want to do it. We have went to a few dungeons here and I even ended up taking one class on submission though! So now, you see why this is so important. To me it is an experiment to see what I can learn about sex, fetishes, and the community. To him, it is becoming a way of life. He wants to open up a dungeon and everything through our company. I am not so sure how I truly feel about it because it does relate back to some of the scenes in Wicked City. I think he is jumping the gun, we first need to put out our ideas and philosophies, then worry about making "theme parks". So tonight I am going to go talk to Zillah about all of this, he is the third stakeholder in our company. Wish me luck....

This one windy Saturday

I woke up this morning in a fit of rage. I was angry and wanted to kill him. My heart was beating fast. After thinking about what was going on, I realized that no matter what I do, how much I change, how much I help, how much care I give, it will never be reciprocated by him. He sees me as supportive and in his eyes, I should be happy that I am useful to him. However, I have never seen him be supportive of anything that I do, and as of lately he has been more of a burden than useful to me. I was enraged.That's when I rolled over...and I saw it....

 I saw the most beautiful sunrise I can possibly remember. It was clear after days of gloomy rain and sinus pressure. I opened the window and it was windy. As I breathed in this fresh new air, suddenly and instantly, the anger went away. It must have been swept away by the wind that blew in through the window. I know that there is nothing I can do to change his mind about me, so why I should I let it bother me? I am supportive and that is, in fact, a useful quality. I just have to remember that it is my choice, my will, of who I want to be useful to. I went about my day peacefully. I did things to the beat of my own drum. I was creative and social. I was productive. I was inspired this one windy Saturday.

Loser

I would have done everything for you.
Now you get nothing.
You will leave again.
I will not ask for you back.
My heart will be broken.
You will not even realize what you have done.

Visa Prepaid Giftcards....

absolutely suck! Never get them and think you are doing someone a favor...you are not. I made the mistake of accepting one as payment for some side work I did. I could not use it to pay the remainder of my rent. I went to use it to put gas in my car and they put a hold on the remainder of my funds. Funds that I needed to buy food. So now I am stuck here waiting for the days to go by so that I can access funds that are mine, with no food. When I mean no food, I mean nothing. I have ketchup and a bottle of water...oooo yeah! So thanks to the people who feel that prepaid debit cards are a great thing, they screw you over.